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In October 2006 a symposium took place at Ushaw College to reflect on home is a holy place and to devise practical strategies for effectively communicating the holiness of our homes. You can read the outcomes here and use the sidebar links to reach the pages that describe more closely the activity of the symposium. Press Coverage | Presentations | Liturgy and Prayer | Strategies | Feedback Press Release: October 31st 2006 Articles: Summaries of Presentations: Themes and
Challenges from Listening 2004 (Rt
Rev John Hine & Elizabeth Davies) Introduction: Nearly
a million Listening 2004 leaflets were circulated throughout the dioceses
targeting parishes with questions designed to spark conversations about
marriage and family life. In the context of affirming families in our
church, we wanted to gain clarity about the reality of family life today,
about families’ needs, and about the means by which families might
effectively be supported by our church. The objective was for parishes to
feed the recurring themes from parish conversations into a diocesan family
listening day. Absence of
Awareness of Marital and Family Spirituality: You
cannot read the Listening 2004 report without tasting the reality of
family life, the pressures, the joys, the sadnesses, the ways of life, the
successes, the failures, the sacrifices made for each other, the
expectations, and above all the immense sense of belonging to each other
which overwhelms all other considerations. The generous self-giving of
time, attention, love, forgiveness, affirmation, support and so on jump
out of the pages. But none of this was identified as family spirituality!
Why not? Themes: Hope - A
hugely important sign of hope for the Church in families' responses came
from the overarching importance to families of the blessing of
'togetherness'. See Familiaris Consortio #18 This togetherness is also
'the good par excellence of family life'. (Letter to Families 1994 #15)
Our families appreciate this in abundance. We must find ways to
acknowledge and celebrate this more in our Church life if we are to
harness the graces that God has given us. Charity - Every
family listening day that we attended during 2004 illustrated the huge
concern for one another that exists within our Christian community. No-one
should feel alone and unsupported within the Church which can be family
for everyone. Challenges: 2:
We heard a lot about the difficulties families face 3:
We heard some important things about the community that is family 4:
We heard a lot about diversity of faith experience and practice within
families 5:
We heard about the importance of relationships with others in their parish
Spirituality for Married and Family Christians: Biblical and Theological Foundations. Dr David M. Thomas Point one: All places are holy – filled with God’s presence “So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God.” 1 Cor. 10:31 Hurrahing the Harvest by
G. M. Hopkins What all do we see? Point two: All spaces between us are life-giving – filled with God’s love “Where two or three are gathered, I am there among them.” Matt. 18:20 “Some day, after mastering the winds, the waves, the tides and gravity, we shall harness for God the energies of love and then, for the second time in the history of the world, we will have discovered fire.” Teilhard de Chardin Point three: Especially holy are those places
where love gives birth to life. One of the great theological breakthroughs of Vatican II was its affirmation that love gives birth to life! Certainly, this has deep footings in Trinitarian Theology. We will explore historically and
currently the belief that the Christian family is the domestic church and
therefore, the family itself has its own sacramental and spiritual life.
Family
Spirituality in Times of Hurt, Loss, Conflict, Tensions, Despair and Loss. Dr
Kathleen Chesto For so
many parents, for so many involved in the listening process that you have
so courageously undertaken, the biggest question has become “Where did
we go wrong?” We are
not good parents if our children turn out well.
We are good parents if we
turn out well through the process of parenting. Ring
out the bells that still can ring, Our
joys are common, the new baby, the weddings, the graduations, the rituals.
They are what unite us and make us feel part of a huge family. Our
griefs are solitary. Many of
those who responded to the listening process talked about the isolation,
the sense of being abandoned We all
start off hoping for the “perfect family” then life intervenes.
We see other perfect families and think we are the only ones who
don’t measure up to the mythical ideal.
But those families who have experienced no trauma, abandonment,
disruption are not holy. They
are fortunate. Holiness is
what happens in the time of crisis. In
Genesis, the Spirit moves over the waters of chaos and it is out of chaos
that creation comes. It is out
of the chaotic in family life that holiness comes.
The cracks are where the light gets in.
The
prodigal son is Jesus’ story of a holy family.
Family welcomes us home, whether or not we have declared our
sorrow, have offered a firm purpose of amendment, or made restitution.
Family love comes first and it is often that love that allows us to
be sorry. Family love reaches
out to the “good sons” as well, inviting them in also.
But Jesus makes it clear that the holiness of the parents is not
dependent on whether or not the children accept the parents’ invitation. The
institutional church has not always understood family life well.
In this age, when family is changing so rapidly, the institution is
a little lost in its efforts to relate to family.
Parents recognize that they belong to a generation that was raised
on bedrock and they are rearing children raised on quicksand.
The world around us is changing at such a phenomenal pace.
Church is often seen by today’s young as irrelevant to their real
world. Religion was meant to
be a bridge spanning the secular to the sacred.
Too many of today’s young see their parents and their church too
caught up with rebuilding the bridge and not focused enough on the shores.
It does not offer them answers to the real life questions they
face. As their parents, we
often feel that, not only are we not supported in helping them find their
way, we are torn between our love for the church and our love and respect
for our children. Holiness
of family life cannot be measured by church participation.
Holiness for families involves putting skin on God.
Making God present. Allowing God in.
Calling the family the “domestic church” implies that being
holy is being like a little church in the home.
To be holy is to be like God and God is not a church.
God is a family, a loving relationship, and that is why we bless
ourselves and name God Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
We do not need families to be domestic churches as much as we need
churches to be families. Our greatest task is not bringing families back to church, but putting families back in the arms of a loving God. Marital Spirituality and Family Spirituality — Paths That Converge and Diverge? Thomas Knieps-Port le Roi, INTAMS/K.U Leuven 1. The paper starts from the observation that both the official churches and we as normal Christians are gradually discovering the realm of interpersonal relationships and of domestic living as a genuine and authentic place of faith life and of spirituality, thus coming to terms with a long-lasting teaching and practice that saw in monastic and celibate life the ideal of spiritual perfection. By distinguishing between “marital spirituality” and “family spirituality” a first attempt is made to map out the diversity and variety of life situations, experiences and practices that are all part of today’s domestic living and that may have the potential to build upon various and different forms of spiritual life. 2. Drawing on the outcome of a recent INTAMS’ research project on “marital spirituality”, the paper then goes on to explore how the new field of spirituality is dealt with in the relevant spiritual and theological literature. Unsurprisingly, the two descriptors of “marital” and “family” spirituality recur in most publications. However, although both terms are often used synonymously, two different spiritual models lie at their basis. The so-called conjugal model of spirituality
The so-called family model of spirituality
3. While the “conjugal model” tends to impose itself as the normative spiritual model pretending to permeate and inspire the whole range of familial relationships, the “family model” is at risk of excluding the marital commitment and of undervaluing its spiritual potential. Taken separately, both models are insufficient. It is suggested instead to refer to the model of the “family of God” constituted in Christ’s New Covenant as an integral model for domestic spirituality. In this model, we are first of all brothers and sisters of Christ and thus brother and sister to each other, before we are husband and wife or son and daughter of our father and mother. This model could inspire married persons as well as parents, children, siblings, and extended family to find a spiritual basis for their specific life situations. Liturgical
& Prayer Resources Symposium
Anthem - Love is Strong: A worship song with keyboard or guitar
accompaniment Actions and
Strategies Devised by Participants During session 6 of the symposium participants were challenged to identify practical strategies by which both families and the wider community could be supported in developing greater awareness and understanding of the graced, blessed and holy reality of Christian marriage and family life. These are just a few of the ideas that were generated: 1. Affirm
the life of the family as holy, good and important in the eyes of God
through meetings for adults at key sacramental moments, parenting courses,
parish missions for marriage and family life.
2. Deepen
awareness of holiness of domestic life
by publicising and encouraging a range of domestic rituals and
blessings. 3. Awaken
families to the holiness that is present in family life and in personal
relationships
using existing small groups within parish community (Baptism/marriage
preparation, confirmation, etc) to explore how God works in their lives. 4. Provide
a resource for priests and catechists to identify and affirm the value of
families at all the contact moments of sacramental preparation and
celebration - other pastoral moments too.
5. Review
materials currently used. Get diocesan MFL agencies and catechetics people
to work together.
6. Enable
everyone to be aware of the holiness of their vocation. Re-affirm the
parental vocation of educating their children.
Engage
parents in the preparation of their children for sacraments and enable
them to do it.
7. Enable
family life to be understood as the main road to holiness for most people
through training
and formation including the sharing of good practice.
Identify and develop strategies for delivering pre-marriage
preparation, parenting, development of faith and spirituality, sacramental
preparation
8. Help
married couples to reflect on their lived experiences of married life and
to discern the spirituality therein.
9. Provide
an audio visual display at the back of church to raise awareness of the
holiness of homes. 10. Translate
the message that Home is a Holy Place so that people can see God in the
ordinary—look for images, words, poetry, music 11. Identify
Sundays when readings are apt to teach about HHP. Commission several known
quality preachers to produce homily notes & other liturgical
suggestions eg bidding prayers, symbols etc. Circulate
to
all
clergy.
12. Enable
parishes to develop a vision that integrates a family perspective within
an intergenerational context.
Communicate
the vision and develop a process to enable families and parishioners both
to own the vision. Include school/parish/families. "It's
been very rare these last few years that we are still absorbing and
discussing the weekend a week later and will be for some time. The
content and balance were perfect for us touching both hearts and heads
just as needed.”
“Most
helpful were the standard & expertise of speakers; opportunity for
networking; good/small group process effective; comfort of being with
people of like mind.”
“This
is the best organised event I have ever attended. The speakers were
inspiring and provoking. The company was excellent. Congratulations.” “On
the whole this has been a very positive experience. You have been
ambitious but not overly so. A big concern I have is the lack of a
theologian from the UK.”
“Don’t
we have any ‘thought leaders’ in the Catholic Church in England and
Wales? Would it be useful to spend time considering why we haven’t?
Thanks to the Management team for a well “I
think the organisers are to be congratulated for a magnificent job! THE
WHOLE LISTENING PROCESS WAS/IS AMAZING AND ONE CAN ONLY HOPE AND DREAM OF
THE IMPACT THIS WILL HAVE ON OUR CHURCH. THANK YOU.”
“A
weekend to relish, ponder over, pray about, pray for. Please keep going
and bring the project to fruition.” “This
was an extremely bold and ambitious venture, well rooted, well planned and
well executed – a huge credit to the organisers.”
“Sometimes
we come from families where we get the least support, affirmation and
respect at home and therefore are not experiencing family spirituality.
This needs to be addressed |
